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I think all the crazies are leaving the asylum today. I might get the chance to finish watching Century Hotel, since I was so rudely interrupted the other night.

I also want to do some general website cleanup that I've been putting off.

But mostly, I want to make a dent in the Elysium stuff. I am currently completely blocked to crap, and that is not good. I think what I need is to put the troublesome Aiden story aside. It really is being a pain in the butt because it's just so different. It really throws me away from the actual plot of the series. I need to get my mind around the plot again.

Keep in mind I plotted this last year.

Once I get that block unblocked, I'll go back to finishing AR, which really, is technically more important than Elysium. I just have a weird way of doing things, I guess.

Got this from someone on the Wraithbait mailing list.

These are the 10 winners of this year's Bulwer-Lytton contest, AKA "Dark and Stormy Night Contest" (run by the English Department of San Jose State University), wherein one writes only the first line of a bad novel.

10) "As a scientist, Throckmorton knew that if he were ever to break wind in the echo chamber, he would never hear the end of it."

9) "Just beyond the Narrows, the river widens."

8) "With a curvaceous figure that Venus would have envied, a tanned, unblemished oval face framed with lustrous thick brown hair, deep azure-blue eyes fringed with long black lashes, perfect teeth that vied for competition, and a small straight nose, Marilee had a beauty that defied description."

7) "Andre, a simple peasant, had only one thing on his mind as he crept along the East wall: 'Andre creep... Andre creep... Andre creep.'"

6) "Stanislaus Smedley, a man always on the cutting edge of narcissism, was about to give his body and soul to a back alley sex-change surgeon to become the woman he loved."

5) "Although Sarah had an abnormal fear of mice, it did not keep her from eeking out a living at a local pet store."

4) "Stanley looked quite bored and somewhat detached, but then penguins often do."

3) "Like an over-ripe beefsteak tomato rimmed with cottage cheese, the corpulent remains of Santa Claus lay dead on the hotel floor."

2) "Mike Hardware was the kind of private eye who didn't know the meaning of the word 'fear'; a man who could laugh in the face of danger and spit in the eye of death -- in short, a moron with suicidal tendencies."


1) "The sun oozed over the horizon, shoved aside darkness, crept along the greensward, and, with sickly fingers, pushed through the castle window, revealing the pillaged princess, hand at throat, crown asunder, gaping in frenzied horror at the sated, sodden amphibian lying beside her, disbelieving the magnitude of the frog's deception, screaming madly, 'You lied! You lied!"


( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
May. 24th, 2005 03:45 pm (UTC)
I think I saw no. 8 once at the beginning of a particularly bad Highlander Mary Sue.

Except she had blond hair. Other than that, it's was almost that exact same sentence.
May. 24th, 2005 03:51 pm (UTC)
*lmao* Figures.
May. 24th, 2005 04:21 pm (UTC)
My friend Maggie used to send me updates of this fic(that appeared on her Highlander mailing lis, unfortunately) that she'd msted, and I'd laugh til I peed myself.
It was easily the most horrendous Mary Sue I've ever read.
May. 24th, 2005 04:27 pm (UTC)
*lol* Oh sorry I missed that.

Reminds me of the Night Travels of the Elven Vampire review.
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )

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